Last year I learned a lot; not only about photography but about myself. I learned that my emotions have limitations, that personal life greatly affects my art. I'm going to be honest with you....I had moments when my creativity was stuck in this small box and no matter how hard I clawed and pried at the lid, I was left frustrated. These feelings were evident in my work. Sometimes even the color itself seemed so drained, I'd stare at my photographs and wonder, is it off?, is it the monitor? And then I'd catch myself scrolling through rows after rows of beautiful work on Pinterest until my eyes glazed over, wondering what part of the heart did these images come from? Had I lost my magic, my love of this craft in only a short amount of time? No...but I had forgotten that feeling.
I haven't picked up my camera in a while. It lies in its bag, quiet in the corner. A lot of people think that the camera is responsible for what they see. The inner-workings of the device collaborate and fire off exactly when the photographer wants them to, but this does not mean the images are solely made by something manufactured in a high end company. They are created by someone who breathes life and sees beauty in the unimaginable and feels the softest of heartbeats in the still air.
They are made by people who dream in saturated colors, who see love in the tiniest of corners, hidden in the shared laughter of two beings.
And yes, they are created even by people like me, who aren't always confident in our work. We all have a rut. No matter our profession, our skill, or purpose, there is always going to be a moment when we don't feel passionate and we break everything we touch. We are all going to have a mental block and at some point in time will think that we've lost our creative spirit.
But if there is something 2013 has taught me is that I can fall out of love with something but when I find myself immersed in it again, remember what lit the fire, my affection for it strengthens and leaves me breathless, impatient with the need to capture delightful moments.
2014 is going to be a beautiful year, filled to the brim with experiences that I will sometimes choose to lift up my camera to freeze or I will ignore the need and live it breath by breath. I ended 2013 with apprehensions and fears and I'm starting 2014 with a clear mind.
I can't wait to meet all my new clients this year. I can't wait to hear their love stories, to understand what makes them smile the brightest. I can't wait to meet you.